We made direct amends where possible, except when doing so would cause harm.

Step Nine is about repair. It grows naturally out of the willingness we developed in Step Eight, where we named those affected by our self-protection. In this step, we begin to move toward those relationships with care and responsibility.

Direct amends mean addressing harm openly and honestly. In some cases, this includes a clear apology. In others, it means acknowledging impact without explanation or defense. Step Nine asks us to focus on repair, not on being understood or forgiven.

Many of us are tempted to use amends as a way to relieve our own discomfort. We may want closure, reassurance, or resolution. Step Nine invites restraint. We do not rush to speak if doing so would cause further harm or shift the burden onto others.

This step also reminds us that words alone are not always enough. Some amends require sustained changes in behavior. Listening instead of correcting, respecting boundaries, and allowing others their own experience can be forms of direct repair when words are insufficient or inappropriate.

Discernment is essential here. In some situations, a direct apology supports healing. In others, silence and changed conduct are more responsible. Step Nine asks us to consider carefully what serves repair rather than self-relief.

Letting go of control is often the hardest part of this step. We cannot manage how our amends are received. Some relationships may heal. Others may remain distant. Step Nine teaches us to accept both outcomes without retreating into defensiveness or resentment.

Amends are not a single event. They continue as we live differently over time. Each day offers new opportunities to act with greater humility, honesty, and care.

For today, it is enough to take responsibility where we can, and to do no further harm.